You can't see all the wonders inside that make a person a great at what they do

Our society runs off of external input. Whether we think of it from a entertainment perspective or a workforce. In order to be doing a good job, something should be tactile, visible and qualitative/quantitative. But there is so much more depth in our human experience than that.

We also can value the importance of holding space, being a coregulator for another persons nervous system. Things that you cannot see but can feel.

This is part of my educator role.

My student requires assistance in regulating their nervous system. As we (the parents and I) continue to navigate what this looks like, I am learning that there is so much power in the unspoken roles people have.

An outsider looking in, would see something like this: student upset, maybe yelling maybe crying. You see me, the educator in the same room quiet, still but watching the student. It's also what you feel in that space. While there is a lot of chaos, you also sense calmness, a bubble of safety forming around the student. And soon they connect with that space, they work through their emotions and on great days, they will come back around minutes later in their "downstairs brain" able to communicate what had just occurred.

You may have hear about this discussed with babies or toddlers who don't quite yet know how to regulate themselves.

My student is much older than that age range. And it is a skill they may never reach "Normal" levels of.

My role working with this student is of course helping them catch up academically and grow as a learner. But they can't be open to learning if they aren't in a regulated state. And they can quickly shift. I am not having a discussion with them as it happens. I am not saying, "Okay, I'm going to be a coregulator for you since you can't do it yourself". Many of the skills I implement go unspoken. And in many situations, you may assume nothing is happening. But it's the behind the scenes. At reptile camp, they are calm and playing with friends and engaged, and I am present, connected and being a grounding point for them. We have seen when I am disconnected and not a grounding point, how things can take a turn for the worst.

There is a science behind our nervous systems and how they are regulated. There is an energetic field around our emotions and nerves that we can sense, even if we cannot name.

Someone feels "dark". "They are such a light to be around". We sense things. My role is to help these senses align for my student to feel connected, grounded and safe. In order to then create, learn, grow, socialize. All of the things they really want to do, but that their body doesn't always allow them to achieve.